Journal, a new beginning

Hello again, my dearest and faithful blog. I know, it has been a long time. At least for me, and I missed you.

Here I am, still since our last time, seating at a bar in Pigneto. A very distinctive and edgy Roman neighborhood. And again, here I am trying to decide my future, or at least to see it clearly. Because sometimes I believe our destiny is decided beforehand. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in free will, and if someone always fought to change it, it is me. With time though, I learned my mistake was exactly that: to fight. We cannot fight against what is meant for us, we are not in control of certain things. Actually, of most things. The only thing we are in control of, I learned, is our own thoughts, actions and beliefs. And even those, if we are not careful, are easily influenced by the external.

Well, here I am, had a coffee and hearing 70s music at my new favorite spot for wifi.

And even if it looks exactly the same it did months ago, when I sat not too far from here, wondering what to do with my life…. everything changed. Isn’t it how life is? we constantly move and change. The only stillness can be within us. When we are truth to ourselves and our convictions. To who we are.

I like to believe I am truth to my nature, and to who I am. I can see clearly, I know my objectives and goals as I know the back of my hand. the path to get there, that is not my business. The how, the when, who and which will reveal itself. All I have to do, is to continue to be faithful to what my heart wants. To my call.

Even if no one else understands it, or believe you are wrong, we are meant to follow that path. Sometimes a blind path, a scary and difficult one, but ours only. The call won’t stop, it will awake you in the middle of the night, it will follow anywhere you go. Until you answer.

Truth yourself.

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Journal of a Journey: My call

I always knew what I wanted. As many of you, I wanted to change the world. Nothing else, nothing more. With time, of course, I realized it was not such an easy task. That the world as a whole cannot be changed, it can only be understood. With time I also learned what I really, really wanted is for every child in the world to have the same, or better, opportunities as I did.

Of course this is an ambitious goal, maybe a bit too ambitious. But I tend to aim high.

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Journal of a Journey: Day 3

In real time, I have been in Morocco for almost a week. But since time stops here it feels like much less. Although I am afraid time is passing by and I will have to leave eventually. I wish this time will never end, that I can wake up every day of my life in Marrakech and go buy freshly made warm msemen. Have a mint tea every evening while I watch the sun setting over Jemaa-El-Fna.

Today is Christmas Eve. And yes, I feel sad for not being at home with my family. But there is nowhere else in the world I could be but here.

This year has been particularly hard for me. At the same time, it has taught me so much about how strong and capable I am. It has also taught me that I have to let go of material stuff, because I have nothing at the moment and I feel so free. I also learned that my home is within me. That I feel stable and confident if I constantly move. I also remembered that love can change it all. I met so many people. Some of them I don’t ever want to cross path, others, I wish we can share the same path for the rest of this journey.

This year I have conquered the impossible. Worked full time and obtained two master’s degrees. All made possible because of the desire that drives me: to dedicate my life to those in need. To those children out there and, whom I believe, deserve the same opportunities I had, or better ones.

2019 is coming. With many new objectives, challenges, places to see and smiles to share. I can’t wait.

19 is my favorite number. 19 is Ka. Ka like the wind.

There will be water if God wills it (Stephen King).

Merry Christmas! 

With Love from Morocco ❤

The road to Fulfillment

For the medieval imagination, places were charged with a positive sense of thickness, stability, and indivisibility. Space, by contrast, was nothing but the empty “in between,” something that only came into existence as the distance separating two places, two significant points of reference. – Ricardo Padron

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Journal of a Journey: The beginning

Talking to my friend last night I realized, once again and as every time I tell ‘my story’, how much had happened in the last 4 years. Specially in the last two. I know life is a constant change… But a life can really change 365 degrees in such a short period of time as 2 years? But maybe not 365, because that would take you back to where you started. And I am very far away from there. Not only physically, but mentally and above all emotionally.

Stop a minute. Think about how far you have travelled. Do not count in miles, but in experiences. In friends. In cities you have seen. In delicious plates you have eaten. In laughs or smiles. Those are what count in life.

Well here I am. 2 years after I left my settled life in New Orleans, that one I thought ‘the one’. My stable job. My nice apartment. I took a leap. I jump to the unknown. And here I am. Am I? or this is a whole different person? Yeah that’s it… We are are different from who we were two years ago. A year ago. Even last week. Constant Change. 

That leap drove me into discovering not only what I want to do with my life (what I really, really want ) but also to discover who I am. Even in constant change, my essence sort of thing, is still there. Growing and developing and discovering new parts every day.

As I sit by my window overlooking one of Amsterdam’s canals, in my favorite and most beautiful neighborhood this city has, I just feel grateful. Deeply grateful for every second I went through. For my accident, the broken heart, the hunger of my first years in the US, for the pain and fear, for the friends I’ve made, for the strength I got from it. For the mistakes and mistakes and mistakes. For all. For my braveness and courage to never give up and always, always try one more time to fulfill my destiny.

Cheers to new beginnings/ends… because aren’t they the same thing?